Active Listening

 

Listening is as important as speaking in the communication process. Communication and connection has not taken place until both the speaker and the listener have the same understanding regarding the object of discussion. Listening is an art. It is a process of taking and processing verbal information from another source. Competent listening requires focused attention.

Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to others, paying complete attention to the speaker. Active listening requires one to suspend his own frame of reference, judgement and evaluations of what is being said as well as other mental ruminations which may interfere with his ability to pay attention to the speaker.

What are the Elements of Active Listening?

Active listening is a method that requires the listener to understand, and respond to what they hear in order to foster mutual understanding. More often than not, people do not listen attentively to what is being said because they are distracted, pondering about other things, or thinking about how they are going to respond especially in conflict situations. The process of active listening involves:

• Comprehension: This is the first step in the listening process. Comprehension refers to the ability to grasp the meaning of something. In conversation, it refers to shared meaning between the speaker and the listener. The biggest challenge for the listener is accurately identifying and interpreting the meaning of words used in the context of the conversation. Ask questions on issues that require more clarification. The whole essence of the communication process will be lost if the listener does not understand most the information being passed across. If you need more explanation, ask the speaker to explain further, giving relevant examples if it will help.
• Retention: The ability to remember accurately, the details of what is being said is very important in conversation because the information we retain during the listening process helps to formulate the appropriate response to what is being said. Maximum retention takes place when you listen with your full attention on the speaker’s message.
• Feedback: Feedback is another important aspect of active listening, as listening is a two way process.  You could paraphrase what you have heard in order to be sure that what you heard is what the speaker really meant. Note that you do not necessarily have to agree with the speaker’s point of view. By paraphrasing, you are only restating the speaker’s words for the sake of confirmation. Restating what was said allows you to listen for unsaid words and underlying emotions especially in emotionally charged conversations. Thus, the listener may use the opportunity to acknowledge the emotions of the other person (anger, excitement, etc). Feedback could be given through verbal expression of t  houghts, comments and suggestion regarding what is being said. It could also take the form of other non verbal forms like nodding the head to signify agreement, or simply adjusting your body language to suit the mood of the conversation. Ask relevant questions to show that you are really listening to what is being said.

When practicing active listening,

Try not to make any evaluations or inferences about what is being said until the speaker is done, as your thoughts, whether positive or negative will most likely be visible to the other person(s) through your facial expressions.  Making judgement calls and inferences early about what is being said could shut down your listening early, preventing you from hearing important aspects of the what is being communicated. It’s best to keep your thoughts open, following the speaker as the conversation unwinds. 

Listen to the entire message before giving a response. This will let you hear everything that is being said. Cutting the speaker off with your own thoughts or letting your mind wander off to some other issues while the conversation is still on will take you away completely from the conversation. Besides, you would miss valuable information while your mind is busy with something totally unrelated to what is being said.

Showing a respectf
 ul understanding for the experiences of others is an important aspect of active listening. People tend to communicate clearly and more effectively when they feel that the listener understands what and how they feel. It is therefore crucial for the listener to show empathy for views of the speaker in order to facilitate free exchange of information.

Non verbal cues from the speaker may offer you more insight into what the speaker is trying to communicate as it has been affirmed that about 75% of communication takes place through non-verbal means. Listen beyond the words: Does the tone of voice match what is being said? Is the speaker’s posture relaxed or rigid? Is the verbal and non verbal communication consistent? Does he/she maintain eye contact?

Lastly, get rid of any form of distractions that may interfere with your conversation like a TV programme, an unfinished project, or a ringing cell phone. Do away with personal emotions during conversation. Ask questions and paraphrase back to the speaker to clarify understanding. Maintain appropriate eye contact.

Benefits of Active Listening:

Effective listening helps to get people to open up and say more, especially in situations where emotions are running high and people tend to get on the defensive and withdraw.

Active listening helps people to avoid misunderstandings and resolve conflicts faster as it involves accurate un
derst

 anding of what the other person has said.

The ability to practice active listening can improve interpersonal relationships as it fosters understanding and strengthens bonds.

In teams, active listening helps to strengthen cooperation among team members through improved communication and better understanding. Active listening fosters cooperation and builds trust due to the fact that it totally erases misunderstanding. People tend to respond favourably when they feel that the other person is positively attuned to their feelings.